


Anything you say, Sugarbean

by funeralfiona



Category: Superjail!, The Lorax - Fandom
Genre: Drinking, M/M, Rants, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-21
Updated: 2014-08-21
Packaged: 2018-02-14 01:48:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2173455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funeralfiona/pseuds/funeralfiona
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Warden weathers the drunken complaints of the Once-ler.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Anything you say, Sugarbean

“It’s sick!” His head flew back as he downed the whiskey in one shot. Coming up for air with a rough exhale he heaved in again, his voice and throat channeling fire. “It’s abusive!”

“Yes, totally!” The Warden tried his best to chime in but he didn’t typically give in to the contagion of anger, or at least that is what he believe about himself. He wrapped his tongue around the tonic straw and sipped at his Ginger Ale, enjoying the buzz of bubbles between his teeth. Leaning in supportively he waited for the Once-ler to say more, he was sure he had more to say, he could tell by the way his eyes shifted and searched the grains of the bar surface.

Once-ler shook his head in disgusted, twisting his mouth with the sour taste of alcohol and betrayal. “I give them everything they want! They just need to ask! I’m all about giving the people what they want!” His long fingers flicked and constricted in agitation under the bar lights, making the fabric seem over worn. “Then they go on a say such things about me?! It’s not honest! Don’t they know I’m honest?!” Bunched up and tense he gestured to the idle Warden. “Aren’t I an honest guy?!”

The Warden sat up straight on his stool and squared his shoulders, hoping to seem convincing and honest himself. “Oh very honest, the most honest man I know!” then slouched when his lover nodded in acceptance and turned away. Once-ler helped himself to another pour of whiskey and threw it back. “It’s like having ungrateful children.” His voice became lower with the last draught and his whole form subdued.

“They need me…they owe me…and their too fuckin’ dumb to know it! I should just pull back, no more nice guy, no more public relations and park openings, or Dr. Suess book readings at day cares or…or…kisses for babies…no…no more ‘Oh mister Onceler, will take a picture with my young aspiring wanna-be model daughter!?’ no more!”

The Warden wagged his finger and clicked his tongue. “Now –now, Sugarbean! Don’t make them into something you’re not! Don’t give them the pleasure! It’s all just cheap, red-light gossip!” Padding gently at his lovers arm he leaned in to rest against him but the drunken Once-ler spasmed away.

The Warden gave a dignified pout. “It is cheap, isn’t it?! A low-brow tabloid, not even a real magazine with real journalists! Worst part of it all…” His hat nearly twisted off as he jerked towards the Warden. “Do you know the worst part?!”

“What?!” The Warden gave an irritated shriek. Though he supported the concept, he wasn’t enjoying this gut spill. It lacked a lot of himself. _How about a little less blah-blah and little more about me?_

“They buy it! They buy up the damn tabloid! Whose side are they on?! Don’t they know what I went through to become the man behind the Thneed?!” He pour again and only made it half-way through his drink before his gullet couldn’t take anymore. Raw from the burn of whiskey his throat stung fresh, bringing him to gag and retch pathetically all over the bar. Giving in to shame and exhausted by anger he let himself droop down and black out. With his face marinating in spit and Jack, he snored and mumbled.

“…uck!” With careful fingertips that Warden shoved his lover away and let his limp form roll off the bar stool to the sticky floor like a dead dog. “I don’t want to be seen with you, you sad mess. Jailbot, more Ginger Ale!” Returning from his chore of spring cleaning the entirely empty bar, Jailbot sprayed a new ounce of Ale into his Papa’s glass.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a small, uneventful drabble. I find these relaxing.


End file.
